I am deep in the jungle of the assault, and the only verse I can even remember to hang on to is, “Count yourselves dead to sin but alive to God in Christ Jesus” (Romans 6:11). I repeat it to myself. Over and over. It gives me strength to fight the distress, contempt, and judgment.
The enemy seems to be weakening.
I have to remember this: the issue is never the presenting sin. The issue is the surrender, however subtle, of our hearts. The open door, the agreement. What follows is the enemy’s real goal—our separation from God and from our true selves. I think most Christians never see the battle. They think they crave evil things, and they embrace the resulting contempt for their own hearts as true conviction. Then they assume that, of course, God is going to be distant and they live under all of that for years. “My heart is evil. I am such a wretch. Of course God is distant.” They think that’s the Christian life.
But it’s not.
Or at least, it doesn’t have to be. Remember Christian in the valley of the burning pits. Remember where this stuff really comes from. This isn’t your true heart—this is your enemy. Fight back. Guard your heart. The assault will lift, if you hold fast.